You are the best mum for your child

I remember a story I heard when I was a child.
It's about a father and a son going to the market to sell their donkey. The father was riding the donkey and the son was walking behind. Then an old woman said to the father, 'Why are you making your poor son walk while you ride the donkey?'. So the son rode the donkey while the father walked behind them. Then an old man passing by commented, 'What a rude boy, making his father walk while he rides comfortably on the donkey.' This time, both the father and the boy rode on the donkey. But then they met a farmer who scolded them saying, 'The poor donkey! You should be ashamed of yourselves making the donkey carry such a heavy load.' So they decided to both walk to the market. A passerby commented, 'Why are they walking when they have a donkey? They should carry the donkey if they feel so sorry for it.' So the father and son tied the donkey on a wooden pole and carried it to the market. Then the donkey bolted and broke the wooden pole and ran away. I think the moral of the story was that it is foolish to try to please other people. You should make decisions and do things according to your principles and situation and not be swayed by what others say. I feel this is especially true for new mums.

So many people have different opinions about how you should care for your baby. They criticise what you do and suggest ways that you could do things better. These advices might have worked for their babies for their situation, but they fail to realise that every baby is different. I also have to bite my tongue a few times when I talk to other mums. I remind myself that I don't have the answer to putting babies to sleep or breastfeeding well. I was just lucky enough to have a baby that self settles easily and  have had no problems with breastfeeding.

The truth is, you know your baby best. You know what works for your baby and what doesn't. And you make your decisions on how you want to raise your baby according to your principles and the situation you are in. Some people are ok with letting baby cry it out and some aren't. Some people are comfortable with babies going to childcare and some aren't. At the end of the day, you are the one who loves your baby the most and wants what's best for him/her. You are doing the best you can to provide the best for your child, and your baby loves you because you are his/her mum, not because of the things that you do.

So I want to encourage other new mums out there to be confident in knowing you are the best mum for your baby. You are doing a great job no matter what other people say to you.