Life Without Makeup

The weather broadcast said rain, so I had planned to stay home with my baby.
But the skies were showing some occasional sunshine, which made me want to get some fresh air. And just when I was thinking this, Hazzy woke up from his nap. I gave him a quick feed and headed out to the shops. Just as I headed out the door, I realised I was still wearing my sleep socks. Should I change? Nah, I'm just going to my local shops. So out I went, with my red sleep socks, track pants, hoodie and unwashed hair. Not to mention, without makeup. I wouldn't be caught dead in this state before I had my baby. Has motherhood made me let go?

Unlike his mum, Hazzy bathes everyday.

The truth is, ever since I got married anything I do for myself is an effort. I have energy to do the laundry, pack hubby's lunch, make Hazzy's baby food, feed and bathe Hazzy, change Hazzy's nappy, play with Hazzy, cook dinner. But it takes a big effort to take a shower. Or cut my nails. Wax my legs. Wear make up. Exercise. Things I used to quite enjoy doing. But now, grooming myself is the last thing on my priority list.

Should I be worried about my grubbiness? Especially living in a world where a woman ceases to be a woman once she loses her attractiveness? But the people who matter don't mind my being unkempt. Hazzy doesn't care that I pick him up from his cot in the morning with tangled hair. And my hubby seems to still find me attractive. No, fear shouldn't be what drives me to wear makeup.

However, I can't deny that I do feel better when I look my best. And I don't want to look in the mirror one day and get depressed at what I see. I don't want to be one of those bitter women who blames her less than pleasant appearance on her family. Who weighs down her children with a heavy burden called 'mum's sacrifice'.

Sure, I won't look like Posh Spice after three children. And I might have to say goodbye to my 9cm high heel shoes. But once in a while, I should dress up, put on some eye-liner, wear those long boots and feel glamorous. Hopefully, on those special occasions, I can say to myself, 'I still got it.'

On that note, I painted my toenails for the first time after I had Hazzy. Too bad I won't be showing them off much in this cold weather.